100 Hilarious Jokes for Kids {Kid Approved}

   100 Hilarious Jokes for Kids {Kid Approved}

 

 

 

These super funny kids jokes are sure to bring a smile and some laughter. Here are over 100 hilarious jokes for kids to keep everyone laughing.

 

 

We love telling jokes at dinner or on a long car ride!  If you still need more try these jokes for children.

 

I have compiled a long list of what I think are some best jokes for kids.  I tested them on my own children (and husband) and we all were cracking up with these good jokes!

 

These silly jokes for kids are a great way to kill a little time when you are trying to keep kids organized or a child occupied.  Waiting in line, waiting at a restaurant, waiting for the dentist!

 

Pull the jokes up on your phone or here they in a printable form.

 

A LONG LIST OF HILARIOUSLY FUNNY JOKES FOR KIDS

 

Q: Why did the computer go to the dentist?

A: It had a blue tooth.

 

Q. Why did the bicycle fall over?

A: It was two tired.

 

Q: How does a cow do math?

A: With a cow-culator!

 

Q: What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine?

A: A slowpoke.

 

Q: Why is a baseball stadium always cool?

A: It is full of fans.

 

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest?

A: An investigator!

 

Q: Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

A: To get to the bottom!

 

Q: What is the witch’s favorite school subject?

A: Spelling!

 

Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?

A:  I’ll meet you at the corner!

 

Q: Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?

A: Because then it would be a foot.

 

Q:  How do you get a tissue to dance?

A:  You put a little boogie in it

 

Q:  Why did they quit giving tests at the zoo?

A:  Because it was full of cheetahs

 

Q:  Why is a bad joke like a pencil?

A:  Because it has no point

 

Q:  What do you call a pig that knows karate?

A: a pork chop!

 

Q: Why are ghosts bad liars?

A: Because you can see right through them!

 

Q: What animal needs to wear a wig?

A: A bald eagle!

 

Q:  Where do polar bears keep their money?

A:  A snow bank.

 

Q:  What room can no one enter?

A:  A mushroom

 

Q:  What kind of key can never unlock a door?

A:  A monkey

 

Q:  What has four wheels and flies?

A:  A garbage truck

 

Q:  Why do graveyards have a fence around them?

A:  Because people are dying to get in.

 

Q:  What did the cheerleader say to the ghost?

A:  Show your spirit.

 

Q:  What did one eye say to the other?

A:  Between you and me something smells.

 

Q:  What do you call fake noodles?

A:  Im-pasta

 

Q:  How does the ocean say hello?

A:  It waves

 

Q:  What do you call cheese that is not yours?

A:  Nacho cheese

 

Q:  What does a nosey pepper do?

A:  Gets jalapeno your business

 

Q:  What do you call a pig that knows karate?

A:  Pork Chop

 

Q:  Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

A:  Because she will let it go

 

Q:  What is the smartest kind of bee?

A:  A spelling bee

 

Q:  Why do bees have sticky hair?

A:  They use a honey comb

 

Q:  What do you get when you cross an elephant and a potato?

A:  Mashed potatoes

 

Q:  What do you call an old snowman?

A:  Water

 

Q:  Why is a baseball stadium always cool?

A:  It is full of fans

 

Q:  Why did Santa go to music school?

A:  So he could improve his wrapping skills

 

Q:  Why couldn’t the pirate learn the alphabet?

A:  Because he was always lost at C

 

Q:  What did the man say when he walked into a bar?

A:  Ouch!

 

Q:  What are the strongest days of the week?

A:  Saturday and Sunday.  Every other day is a weekday

 

Q:  What goes tick-tock and woof-woof?

A:  A watchdog

 

Q:  What do you call a monkey that loves potato chips?

A:  A chipmonk

 

Q:  What did the girl ocean say to the boy ocean when he asked her out on a date?

A:  Shore

 

Q:  Why do shoemakers go to heaven?

A:  Because they have good soles

 

Q:  What did one plate say to another plate?

A:  Dinner is on me

 

Q:  Why did they bury the battery?

A:  Because it was dead.

 

Q:  What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?

A:  Time to get a new fence

 

Q:  Why don’t dinosaurs eat clowns?

A:  Because they taste funny

 

Q:  Why did the girl throw a stick of butter?

A:  She wanted to see a butter fly

 

Q: What did the finger say to the thumb?

A: I’m in glove with you

 

Q:  What has only one eye, but still can’t see?

A:  A needle

 

UPDATED MORE FUNNY JOKES TO TELL

 

 

If you still feel at a loss when your child says, “tell me a funny joke” here are a few more that I just added.  I think they are some really good jokes for kids! Having a good sense of humor can brighten your days!

 

Q: What gets wetter the more it dries?

A: A towel!

 

Q: Why do bicycles fall over?

A: They are too tired.

 

Q: What did the pencil say to the paper?

A: Write on!

 

Q: Why was the baby strawberry crying?

A: Because his parents were in a jam.

 

Q: Why did the scarecrow get a big promotion?

A: Because he was outstanding in his field..

 

Q: What do you call a cow with three legs?

A: Lean beef

 

Q: Want me to tell you a joke about pizza?

A: Sorry, it is too cheesy.

 

Q: Why was the broom late?

A: It overswept.

 

Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

A: In case he got a hole in one.

 

Q: Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

A: They kept saying, “Bach, Bach, Bach.”

 

Q: What word starts with E and has only one letter in it?

A: Envelope.

 

Q: Why is dark spelled with a K and not a C?

A: Because you can’t see in the dark.

 

Q: How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

A: Ten tickles

 

Q: Why did the kid throw the clock out the window?

A: He wanted to see time fly.

 

Q: Why did the banana go to the doctor?

A: It wasn’t peeling well.

 

Q: What kind of tree can fit into your hand?

A: A palm tree!

 

Q: How can you tell that a tree is a dogwood tree?

A: By its bark!

 

Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A: A Gummy Bear

 

Q: Why did the skeleton go to the dance alone?

A: He had no body to go with him!

 

Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope?

A: Stick with me, and we will go places!

 

Q: What’s another name for a clever duck?

A: Wise quacker!

 

Q: Why did the man run around his bed?

A: To catch up on his sleep.

 

Q: Why didn’t the baby skeleton cross the road alone?

A: Because his mummy was not there!

 

Q. What do you call a cow with no legs?

A. Ground beef.

 

Q: What nails do carpenters hate hammering?

A: Fingernails

 

Q: Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

A: Because if they flew over the bay they’d be bagels.

 

Q: What did the traffic light say to the car?

A: Don’t peek – I’m changing!

 

Q: What falls in winter but never gets hurt?

A: The snow!

 

Q: Why did the teacher put on sunglasses?

A: Because her students were so bright!

 

Q: How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity?

A: Shocked!

 

Q: What do you call a flower that runs on electricity?

A: A power plant!

 

Q: Why couldn’t the pony sing in the choir?

A: Because she was a little horse!

 

Q: Why did the cookie go to the nurse?

A: Because he felt crummy!

 

Q: How do you keep a bull from charging?

A: Take away its credit card!

 

Q: What did one plate say to the other?

A: Dinner is on me!

 

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

A: It was the chicken’s day off

 

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire

A: Frostbite!

 

Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?

A: A bulldozer!

 

Q: What can you catch but not throw?

A: A cold!

 

Q: What has hands but can’t clap?

A: A clock!

 

Q: What do you call a dog that can tell time?

A: A watch dog!

 

Q: What has a ton of ears but can’t hear a thing?

A: A cornfield.

 

Q: What goes up and down but does not move?

A: Stairs

 

Q: Why do the French like to eat snails?

A: Because they don’t like fast food!

 

Q: Why can’t Cinderella play soccer?

A: Because she’s always running away from the ball.

 

Q: What did one toilet say to the other

A: You look a bit flushed.

 

Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?

A: It had a virus.

 

Q: How does a cucumber become a pickle?

A: It goes through a jarring experience.

 

Q: Why can’t a cheetah play hide and seek?

A: Because he’s always spotted

 

Q: What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?

A: That hit the spot!

 

Q: What did one toilet say to the other?

A: You look flushed.

 

Q: Why do porcupines always win the game?

A: They have the most points.

 

SCHOOL JOKES FOR KIDS

These cheesy jokes are a great play on words. A good pun relies on words that sound alike and can have a double meaning. Did you know a word or phrase open to two interpretations can be called a double entendre? That will get you extra credit at school

 

Q: Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?

A: He wanted to go to high school.

 

Q: Why wouldn’t the teacher bring the class to the pumpkin patch?

A: It was in a seedy part of town.

 

Q: What did the buffalo say to his kid when he dropped him off for school?

A: Bison.

 

Q: Why did the students eat their homework?

A: Because the teacher told them that it was a piece of cake.

 

Q: Why didn’t the sun go to college?

A: Because it already had a million degrees.

 

Q: Why was the math book depressed?

A: Because it had a lot of problems.

 

Q: What did you learn in school today?

A: Not enough! I have to go back tomorrow.

 

Thanks for watching!