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Computer Programming Jokes Humor
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funny computer programming jokes
Q. How did the programmer die in the shower?
A. He read the shampoo bottle instructions: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None – It’s a hardware problem
Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas?
Because Oct 31 equals Dec 25.
Programming is 10% science, 20% ingenuity, and 70% getting the ingenuity to work with the science.
Programming is like sex:
One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
All programmers are playwrights, and all computers are lousy actors.
The computer is mightier than the pen, the sword, and usually, the programmer.
Any programming language is at its best before it is implemented and used.
Computer analyst to programmer: "You start coding. I'll go find out what they want."
Computer and car salesmen differ in that the latter know when they are lying.
Computer programmers do it byte by byte.
Computer programmers don't byte, they nibble a bit.
Funny Computer Jokes
funny computer programming jokes
A computer's attention span is as long as its power cord.
A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't broken.
Air conditioned environment - Do not open Windows!
All computers wait at the same speed.
Any program that runs right is obsolete.
A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
A program is never finished until the programmer dies
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error.
A user friendly computer first requires a friendly user.
Computers are a more fun way to do the same work you'd have to do without them.
Computers are like air-conditioners: both stop working, if you open windows.
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
Computers can never replace human stupidity.
Computer Science: solving today's problems tomorrow.
Computers follow your orders, not your intentions.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
Computer Science Engineering Jokes
Funny computer science engineering jokes
Computer analyst to programmer: "You start coding. I'll go find out what they want."
Computer and car salesmen differ in that the latter know when they are lying.
Computer programmers do it byte by byte.
Computers are a more fun way to do the same work you'd have to do without them.
Computers... are not designed, as we are, for ambiguity.
- Thomas
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
- Gilb
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
- Pablo Picasso
Computers talk to each other worse than their designers do.
Programming Department: Mistakes made while you wait.
Programming is an art form that fights back.
Programming is an unnatural act.
Programming just with goto's is like swatting flies with a sledgehammer.
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