Funny Puns and Punny Jokes from Pun of the Day

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Monday, 08/01/2018 10:01

Baseball Nut

Ray’s friends claim he’s a baseball nut. He says they’re way off base.


A Smoking-Hot Deal

The public safety officer came up to a large mob of people outside a department store and asked, “What’s happening?”

A mall officer replied, “These people are waiting to get the new Barbie doll.”

The public safety officer shook his head and muttered, “Who can resist a Barbie queue?”


A Lizard Walks Into…

A lizard walks into a bar pushing a baby in a stroller. “What’s your kid’s name?” asks the bartender. “Tiny,” says the lizard. “Because he’s my newt.”



Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where all the fruit is?


String Fight

My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments. If only I had known about her history of violins.


Silk Ties

Did you hear about the 2 silk worms in a race? It ended in a tie!


Police Investigation

Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.


You Don’t Want to Get Busy in an Elevator

Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.


Don’t Try to Steal a Calendar

Last time I got caught stealing a calendar I got 12 months.


A Laughing Motorcycle

What do you call a laughing motorcycle? A Yamahahaha.


Soda to the Head

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.


Brain Transplant

I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.


Mistake on the Calendar

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.


Tender Wood

A termite walks into a bar and says, “Where is the bar tender?”


Burial Plot

I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.


Origami Fail

I put all my spare cash into an origami business. It folded.


You Can’t Afford This Pun

Q: What’s the worst part about movie theater candy prices?

A: They’re always raisinet.


This Plate is Hot

Q: What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?

A: Nacho cheese!


Dancing Too Hard

I went to a seafood disco last week…and pulled a mussel.


Sweet Romance

Q: Why did the apricot ask a prune to dinner?

A: Because he couldn’t find a date.


Super Led Boy


Yo Mama Jokes

Knock Knock Jokes

Romantic Quotes

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